{"id":98727,"date":"2016-08-05T15:19:25","date_gmt":"2016-08-05T19:19:25","guid":{"rendered":"\/news\/?p=98727"},"modified":"2016-08-05T15:19:25","modified_gmt":"2016-08-05T19:19:25","slug":"i-was-conceived-in-rape-but-my-life-has-dignity-and-value","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.liveaction.org\/news\/i-was-conceived-in-rape-but-my-life-has-dignity-and-value\/","title":{"rendered":"I was conceived in rape, but my life has dignity and value"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>

(Savethe1<\/a>) – Why should I have to prove my worth and my right to life? When I first learned at the age of 18 that I was conceived in rape, I instantly felt targeted and devalued by our society because I\u2019d heard what people said about pregnancy \u201cin cases of rape.\u201d<\/p>\n

Right away, I felt I was in a position where I would have to justify my own existence \u2013 that I would have to prove to the world that I shouldn\u2019t have been aborted and that I was worthy of living.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve since found my own value, identity and purpose in Christ, being created by God, in His image, and for a purpose, so I no longer feel I need to prove my worth to others in order to feel worthy. Instead, I share my worth out of gratitude for my own life being spared and in order that others may see the value of those who are still at risk \u2013 those who are in harm\u2019s way as yet unborn and being targeted for abortion in the clinics, in legislation, and in people\u2019s hearts and minds.<\/p>\n

Whenever I speak, I share this aspect of my journey, but people are shocked to hear that I actually do get challenged to prove my value, to demonstrate my positive contribution to society and to justify my right not to have been aborted. This recent e-mail is a case in point. It was a tough inquiry to receive, but you\u2019ll see my hopefully patient (and prayerful) responses below, and the ultimate outcome of the exchange:<\/p>\n

\n

I\u2019m feeling sad and skeptical about rape babies.\u00a0 I\u2019d love to consider myself pro-life due to biblical reasons, but I just don\u2019t really see what good can ever come out of a rape baby. I still think that it sometimes furthers the victimization of a rape victim. And it\u2019s also because I\u2019m very sad and disturbed by your blog.<\/p>\n

I just think sometimes that it would be better if these babies never existed — that every single one would naturally be miscarried by God\u2019s will, so no one could bully them for their skeleton in their closet. Like I said, the subject manner disturbs me to the point where I vomit. I wish that every child was conceived in love and not violence because that’s the way it should be. And I’m sad to say that the only way I could fully believe all of you rape mothers and children is if you were to pray for the peace of God that transcends all my futile understanding and my volatile, overly-sensitive emotions.<\/p>\n

There is no story in the whole world that can fully change my mind. The only way I could ever is if I were to befriend a victim or become the Bride of a man whom was the product of abuse. I’m so sorry to be brutally honest; it’s just that my heart grieves to the point where I feel the struggle to overcome the sin of prejudice. I’m so angry at God that he allows this to occur.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Dear __, I appreciate you going to our blog and taking the time to reach out to us.\u00a0 Your concerns are the most common, but research shows that rape victims are four times more likely to die within the next year after the abortion vs. giving birth. Dr. David Reardon’s book\u00a0Victims and Victors: Speaking\u00a0Out About Their Pregnancies, Abortions and Children Resulting From Sexual Assault<\/a> explains this.\u00a0 So it’s a myth which gets perpetuated — that a rape victim would be better off after an abortion, that her child would be a reminder of the rape, and that she would even see her child as a “rape baby,” as you put it.<\/p>\n

I understand a lot of what you’re saying. \u00a0You would definitely feel differently if you knew someone personally. \u00a0I wished I wasn\u2019t conceived in rape, but I do believe now that God definitely brings good out of evil, and uses tragic situations to bring healing. \u00a0He doesn’t intend the evil of course, but his trademark is redeeming really awful situations.<\/p>\n

— Rebecca<\/p>\n

Her reply (again, challenging for me to read, but I think she candidly articulates a lot of what most people really wonder or think):<\/p>\n

What has God done in your life personally besides this blog that has made your tragic family life worth the pain? Tell me what you have been doing: like marriage, dating, children, jobs, friendship, volunteer work; any of that. I am curious to see how God has given your life joy and purpose. I’m sorry if I have ever been difficult to handle. I’m emotionally impulsive when I hear something sad.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

First of all, my birthmother and her husband legally adopted me 3-1\/2 years ago because my adoptive family was really screwed up (long story of abuse and abandonment.) My own adoption by my birthmother was our fairy-tale ending.\u00a0 She says I’m a blessing to her, I honor her and I bring her healing! I love adoption — my two oldest are adopted (very open adoption,) and we adopted a baby with special needs — Cassie — who died in our arms at 33 days old. It was an honor to take care of her and was definitely one of the most important things I’d ever done in my life. She died because of medical malpractice.<\/p>\n

Married for nearly 17 years, we have 5 children now \u2013 two adopted sons and our three biological daughters.\u00a0 Here’s my son’s story.<\/a>\u00a0He wrote it last September at 12 years old.<\/p>\n

Besides being the president and founder of Save The 1, I also co-founded Hope After Rape Conception<\/a>. I’m a family law attorney, though I closed my law practice to have my children and to home school until 2-1\/2 years ago.<\/p>\n

I make baby quilts which I donate to pregnancy resource centers and I give to moms in unplanned pregnancies. My birthmother taught\u00a0me to sew! I also\u00a0taught my children to quilt, as well as many of my friends and their children. I’ve volunteered with orphan care, Sunday school, feeding the disadvantaged, free legal work, volunteer work for a maternity home, and helping in various ways with pregnancy resource centers. I changed the hearts of Gov. Rick Perry and Newt Gingrich on this issue during their presidential campaigns!<\/p>\n

A large part of what I do is helping others to understand their value, identity and worth because lots of people struggle with these issues — not just those conceived in rape. I hope this helps!\u00a0 — Rebecca<\/p>\n

Her final response \u2013 from someone who said \u201cthere is no story in the world that can fully change my mind\u201d:<\/p>\n

\n

Dear Rebecca, thank you so much for your time to straighten out my emotional acting out — I’m really glad you told me about your life. I really think I’ll be okay now. I still wish that men wouldn’t rape, but at least the world knows a lot more than they used to and I can say that I’m pro-life to my college professors without paranoia or anxiety. I even talked about helping people like you with my mom and dad.<\/p>\n

They told me I’m too sensitive in personality to be involved directly in domestic politics; yet, I’m praying about being a free English tutor for troubled families as well as being an anti-pornography informant or activist. After all, the porn industry has been statistically linked to the sexual violence pandemic. I’m so glad that you are living life well and to the best of your ability; keep telling people that just because your birth father was an evil scumbag doesn’t mean that you are.<\/p>\n

Thanks Rebecca, you have really touched and strengthened my heart. With much sincerity.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Editor’s note: This article originally appeared at Save the 1<\/a>, and is reprinted with permission.\u00a0\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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