{"id":81363,"date":"2015-11-30T22:38:39","date_gmt":"2015-12-01T03:38:39","guid":{"rendered":"\/news\/?p=81363"},"modified":"2015-12-01T20:03:41","modified_gmt":"2015-12-02T01:03:41","slug":"conceived-in-rape-incest-rowenas-life-shares-that-every-child-is-precious","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.liveaction.org\/news\/conceived-in-rape-incest-rowenas-life-shares-that-every-child-is-precious\/","title":{"rendered":"Conceived in rape-incest, Rowena&#8217;s life shares that every child is precious"},"content":{"rendered":"<div style=\"margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px;\" class=\"sharethis-inline-share-buttons\" ><\/div><div class=\"Body\">\n<p>(<a href=\"http:\/\/savethe1.blogspot.com\/2015\/05\/conceived-in-rape-incest-and-pregnant.html\">Save the 1<\/a>) I am sharing my story for every girl who lives in silence, and for every person to understand that all life has value and is worthy of protection.<\/p>\n<div class=\"Body\"><!--more--><\/div>\n<p>I was conceived in father\/daughter rape-incest. \u00a0My mother, Becca, was molested by her father throughout her children and was 15 when I was born.\u00a0 She was offered an abortion by a doctor who had asked her if she had been a \u201cbad girl,\u201d to which she responded that she had not, because she really had no understanding of what he father had been doing to her.\u00a0 This doctor completely failed to help her break free from the molestation.\u00a0 In fact, Child Protective Services also failed to protect my mom, even though they were called by the school authorities, and while at school my mom told them what was happening.\u00a0 Nevertheless, they ultimately sent her home to be abused for several more years.\u00a0Despite the pressure to abort, once my mom knew she was pregnant, she understood that a life was growing inside of her which she could not kill, and so, she refused the abortion and chose to bring me to birth.<\/p>\n<p>When I was born, she said she loved me like a baby doll, but did not know how to care for me.\u00a0\u00a0 As a result, her parents, Ruben and Rosa, raised me as their own until I was around 4 years old. \u00a0At that time, Becca told me that she was my mom. \u00a0Since I didn\u2019t believe her, I asked Ruben and Rosa if this was true, and they confirmed for me that it was indeed true &#8212; they said that what Becca said was correct and that she really was my mom.\u00a0 I remember feeling confused, and to help myself deal with\u00a0the confusion, I\u00a0would call Rosa mom or mamma, and Becca, I would call Becky or mother. \u00a0I remember feeling weird in public because Becca was my sister to the public. \u00a0Overall, I still saw Becca as my sister and friend, even though I knew she was my mom.<\/p>\n<p>My earliest memory of abuse is as a baby. \u00a0My father, Ruben, started to physically and sexually abuse me from around 1 year of age until I was 10 years old. \u00a0In once instance, my grandmother Rosa even caught him and threatened to divorce him if he ever did it again, but I was too scared to tell her what was happening. \u00a0I knew what he was doing was bad, though I didn<span lang=\"FR\">\u2019<\/span>t know the name for it. \u00a0I knew that he was bothering me and I didn\u2019t like it. \u00a0He was a big man (350+ lbs) and he was violent, so I was terrified of him. \u00a0I felt so dirty, defiled and ashamed. \u00a0There are so many memories of the sexual abuse and a great deal of pain in recounting any of them.<\/p>\n<p>My young mom did her best to protect me. \u00a0One of my memories of her protecting me was around the age 8 or 9. \u00a0My father was upset with me about not doing a chore right, so my mom (Becca) told me to hide under the sink and be real quiet. \u00a0I did, but felt guilty because I knew what he would do to her.\u00a0Sure enough, he gave her my beating. \u00a0I could hear it and see from a small hole. \u00a0Other times, she would ask me if he was\u00a0\u201cbothering\u201d me. \u00a0I know I would tell her both no and yes. She would ask me if I would want to go or stay if she ever left, and I would tell her that I definitely wanted her to go!\u00a0Finally, on November 16, 1988, she secretly took me out of school with the help of our oldest sister, Rachel. \u00a0My mom and I ran away with family friends to Plainview, TX, and it was about 7 years before I saw my father or my grandmother again.<\/p>\n<div class=\"Body\">\n<p>Within a couple of months after moving, my mom told me the truth \u2013 that my father had sexually abused her as well, and that I was a result of that abuse.\u00a0 It didn\u2019t shock me because I had a feeling he had been doing the same things to her, but I definitely felt confused, gross, ashamed, and worthless, and wondered how my mother could really love me.<\/p>\n<p>Plainview was supposed to be a new start, but unfortunately, we ended up in an abusive cycle again.\u00a0My mom met my step-father at church, and he was a charmer. \u00a0He swept my mom off her feet. \u00a0I don\u2019t remember exactly how I felt about him, but I do know that I wasn\u2019t happy that he was taking my mom away. \u00a0Shortly after my 11th birthday, he talked my mom into letting me spend the night with him and his girls, and she took his youngest son. \u00a0That night, my future step-father sexually abused me. \u00a0I tried to tell my mom, but the church we were going to gave her bad advice, and they blamed me. \u00a0After that, I felt alone and trapped as the abuse continued over the next five years.<\/p>\n<p>At age 13, I became pregnant by my step-father, though hadn\u2019t realized at the time that I was actually pregnant because I didn\u2019t understand what was going on with my body, and now that I\u2019ve experienced four miscarriages in my life, I realize that I was pregnant by him, ending sadly in miscarrying the baby. \u00a0He had told me that if I ever got pregnant, he would force me to have an abortion.<\/p>\n<p>Until after my sixteenth birthday, I was trapped in a very destructive relationship with my step-father.\u00a0He was completely warped and told me strange things such as that he wanted to marry me and wanted me to raise my younger sisters and brother. \u00a0I prayed for a way out! \u00a0I thought that I would suffocate from the inside and out. \u00a0My way out was close, though I didn\u2019t know that at the time.<\/p>\n<div class=\"Body\">\n<p>My family started going to a new church. \u00a0This church would be the path to freedom that God used to end the abuse. \u00a0One day, in June of 1994, my mom walked in on my step-father raping me. \u00a0The feeling of doom was so thick, I was smothered by it. \u00a0I was sure that my mom was going to send me away, but the next day, she went to our pastor and told him what happened. This time, the pastor called the police. Finally, my cage door was opened!<\/p>\n<p>He was charged and arrested, my step-father and mother got a divorce, the grand jury indicted him, but then the prosecutor cut a plea bargain, so he spent 10 years in prison.\u00a0 Although some would call this justice, I remember feeling at the time very upset that I did not have my say in Court and I wanted my voice to be heard.\u00a0 Finally after all of these years, I have the opportunity to be heard!<\/p>\n<div class=\"Body\">\n<p>I have survived sexual assault and rape by my biological father, uncle, half-brother, step-father and other men. \u00a0Healing started to happen as I sought out counseling. \u00a0At the age of 19, I met my future husband. \u00a0He was the first man who treated me with respect and dignity. We dated for two years before getting married in October of 1999, and he\u2019s been my biggest supporter.<\/p>\n<p>While my husband was away for training with the United States Navy, when I was 22 years old, I was raped by a stranger in a home invasion while I was sleeping.\u00a0 I did everything \u201cright\u201d \u2013 I went to the hospital where we reported it to the police, and I had a rape kit done.\u00a0 I was offered the Morning After pill, but I declined because I knew the risks involved.\u00a0 The perpetrator was never caught.\u00a0 My husband came home within 48 hours of the rape, and we moved to a new location for obvious reasons.<\/p>\n<p>About a month later, I had a positive home pregnancy test. \u00a0I was scared and alone.\u00a0 My husband was back at Naval Training again. \u00a0\u00a0I went to a pregnancy clinic, not knowing the difference between a pro-life pregnancy resource and an abortion-friendly clinic which encourages and refers out for abortions.\u00a0 At this clinic, I was strongly encouraged to have an abortion &#8212; particularly because I was pregnant by rape.\u00a0 I was completely shocked and appalled! I told them I did not want an abortion, and I promptly left.<\/p>\n<p>I told my husband that I was pregnant, and I asked him if he would raise the child with me. \u00a0I was so scared that he might say no! He told me that just as I was a miracle, this child is also a miracle, and that he would love the child like his own. \u00a0In that moment, I felt secure and protected, but at the same time, I felt unworthy of such unconditional love. Within another month, I began to bleed, and I either miscarried or had a false positive pregnancy test.\u00a0 I had a accepted the fact that I was going to have a baby, and felt sad realizing that the baby\u2019s life was gone.<\/p>\n<p>I have had four miscarriages and the doctors told me that it was my genetic makeup due to my conception which makes me more susceptible to miscarriages. Gratefully, my husband and I have two healthy children together.<\/p>\n<p>My path of healing has taken so much hard work, but it has been worth it &#8212; God has been so gracious to me! \u00a0I reconciled with my biological father before he died and forgave him. \u00a0I have worked with my mom to rebuild a broken and confused relationship. \u00a0I am a Christian and find my Hope in Jesus Christ. \u00a0I have come to a place of peace about my conception and I can now voice my deep found identity in the One who created me.<\/p>\n<p>I have now shared my story as pro-life speaker\u00a0with church groups, youth groups, college groups, in the media and testifying before the state Legislature.\u00a0I desire to speak to the value of life &#8212; even the lives of those who, like me, were conceived in incest and\/or rape. \u00a0As I have come to see my life as a precious gift given to me, I want the unborn lives of all to be protected from abortion, and I want every child to be protected from sexual assault.<\/p>\n<p>I am going on 16 years of marriage with my husband Casey. \u00a0We have two beautiful children &#8212; a son and a daughter. \u00a0My family and I are members at Heritage Christian Fellowship. This coming Fall, I will be enrolled at Liberty University where I will be getting my degree in Government &#8211;Western Legal Traditions, so I may continue on to Law School. \u00a0My goal is to become a Constitutional Attorney so I can fight for the rights of the unborn, including those conceived in incest and rape. \u00a0I am working towards getting more involved in the Yahoo email support group for those who have conceived in incest\/rape or who became pregnant by incest or rape. I know God is calling me to use my story to offer hope and healing to others, and to show His goodness in my life!<\/p>\n<p><em>Editor&#8217;s Note: This article originally appeared at <a href=\"http:\/\/savethe1.blogspot.com\/2015\/05\/conceived-in-rape-incest-and-pregnant.html\">Save the 1<\/a>, and is reprinted here with permission.<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>(Save the 1) I am sharing my story for every girl who lives in silence, and for every person to understand that all life has value and is worthy of protection.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":396,"featured_media":81364,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false},"categories":[4],"tags":[19,6434,6435,1315,1767,299,6433],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v20.7 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Conceived in 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