{"id":69866,"date":"2015-08-06T18:20:52","date_gmt":"2015-08-06T22:20:52","guid":{"rendered":"\/news\/?p=69866"},"modified":"2016-04-28T15:41:11","modified_gmt":"2016-04-28T19:41:11","slug":"vox-writer-miscarriage-convinced-keep-fighting-abortion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.liveaction.org\/news\/vox-writer-miscarriage-convinced-keep-fighting-abortion\/","title":{"rendered":"Vox writer: Miscarriage convinced me to keep fighting for abortion"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>

\"sadLast time we checked in with<\/a> the factually challenged \u201cnews explainer\u201d Vox, Executive Editor Matthew Yglesias was testing out the novel (and by \u201cnovel\u201d I mean \u201chorrifying\u201d) argument that the birth of his son convinced him that killing little tykes just like baby Jose needs to stay legal.<\/p>\n

In a similar vein, on Wednesday the site ran a piece<\/a> by Julia Pelly on how her miscarriage of a wanted baby \u201cforced me to rethink everything I believed about abortion.\u201d Except according to her own words, it didn\u2019t change much of anything.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Before, she \u201cwas attending rallies and waving signs in support of women’s access to health care, birth control, and abortion,\u201d full of \u201canger\u201d at politicians who \u201ccharacterized these women as either vindictive baby killers or as so naive as to be tricked by malicious doctors or clinics into killing their babies.\u201d But then:<\/p>\n

\n

I went back to the doctor, and the ultrasound showed no heartbeat, just a still, white form, stark against the black background of the screen. The gummy bear that had been fluttering around, dancing for us just days before, was dead.<\/p>\n

I was devastated. I felt hopeless and helpless, scared and sorrowful. I was scheduled for a dilation and curettage<\/a> on the next Monday, and that weekend, as the Mardi Gras parades rolled by a few blocks from my home and the bands marched and played, I lay in bed crying and mourning for the baby that would never be born.<\/p>\n

When I checked into the hospital that Monday, the stark terminology used during my stay was jarring. Though I knew that \u201cspontaneous abortion\u201d<\/a> was a medical term, it shook me to see the word “abortion” associated with my much-wanted baby. Later, when the doctor explained that after the procedure they would send the \u201cfetal tissue\u201d for testing, I caught my breath. \u201cThat’s not fetal tissue,\u201d I wanted to shout, \u201cthat’s MY BABY.\u201d I was put under with tears in my eyes and woke up still crying.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Powerful and tragic. So how did it inform her rethinking?<\/p>\n

\n

I realized that I was referring to my miscarriage in traditionally pro-life terms. I talked about \u201closing my baby\u201d and daydreamed of kicks and contractions. Typically it’s pro-life activists who argue that life starts at conception, not pro-choicers like me. But my baby had certainly felt alive to me [\u2026]<\/p>\n

As I worked through my grief, I felt guilty both for supporting women’s choices to end their pregnancies and for feeling so sad about the end of mine. What made my baby so different from those I was advocating women be able to \u201cterminate\u201d? I felt a great internal pressure to choose between seeing my baby as a baby or as a ball of cells, as a life or as nothing at all. I did not feel entitled to be both sad about my miscarriage and a supporter of other people’s abortions.<\/p>\n

The questions that kept me up most at night were ones pro-life activists would love for women to have as they consider whether to keep their baby: \u201cDid my baby have a soul? Did my baby know it was alive? Did my baby feel scared as it died?\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Good questions, and more honest than anything many abortion defenders will ever type.<\/p>\n

\"via

(via chatteringteeth.blogspot.com)<\/p><\/div>\n

Yet somehow, she emerged from the other end \u201cat peace,\u201d simultaneously sad about her miscarriage but secure in her original position that \u201cabortion is a fundamental human right.\u201d How can that possibly be? After concluding that the \u201cquestion, really, comes down to: When does life begin?\u201d she resolves (and I can\u2019t stress how loosely I\u2019m using the term) what was billed as deep insight shaped by experience with boilerplate that could have been lifted verbatim from any number of pro-abortion brochures:<\/p>\n

\n

Over and over, her response, lovingly, was, “I don’t know.” Her comfort with uncertainty, with not knowing, helped me ease into being okay with not having the answers.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

\u201cI am okay with determining the fates of millions of children despite not knowing what they are\u201d: abortionism in a nutshell, ladies and gentlemen. All these years after President Ronald Reagan destroyed this irresponsible nonsense<\/a> with the simple, inarguable point that \u201cIf you don’t know whether a body is alive or dead, you would never bury it,\u201d it\u2019s still considered brilliance. She continues:<\/p>\n

\n

I don’t know when life really starts, but I do know that it’s okay for me to mourn the loss of my 10-week-old fetus and for me to simultaneously fight for another woman’s right to end hers. In something so personal, so profoundly life-altering as pregnancy, it’s silly to think that there is a simple black-and-white answer. It’s also silly to think that if you’re pro-choice you can’t mourn a miscarriage or if you’re pro-life you must be devastated by one.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Really? Marriage is \u201cpersonal\u201d and \u201cprofoundly life-altering,\u201d yet of course we can objectively say it\u2019s wrong to get out of one by killing your spouse. Religions are \u201cpersonal\u201d and \u201cprofoundly life-altering,\u201d yet nobody at Vox would take that to mean we can\u2019t condemn the belief in slaughtering those who believe differently.<\/p>\n

\n

In the absence of this knowing, knowing when life begins, we must defer to the woman and to what feels right to her, to the balance she strikes between the life she carries and the life she has.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Aside from the immoral illogic of arguing ambiguity doesn\u2019t<\/em> mean we must err on the side of caution<\/a>, there is no \u201cabsence\u201d to account for. We objectively, scientifically do<\/em> know when life begins<\/a>, and there is no excuse for anybody writing in a professional capacity on the subject to pretend otherwise.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

\n

For me and my baby, life began the moment I knew I was pregnant, and it ended as I watched the dark screen stay still. For another woman life may begin at conception, for another not until the baby is wet and wiggling in her arms. Each woman has a backstory, the things that came before the pregnancy, the things that will inform her feelings and her choices.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

So your perception defines the reality of other people\u2019s existence? Readers, I defy you to find a more supernatural, anti-empirical claim anywhere in the Bible.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

\n

I trust women to know themselves, to know their lives, and to make good choices for themselves.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Well, then, why don\u2019t we repeal all our laws? I trust that most people won\u2019t murder, steal, rape, vandalize, counterfeit, drive drunk, sell drugs, litter, slander, or embezzle, and if all legal prohibitions are just referendums on \u201ctrust\u201d without regard for the effect our actions have on others\u2026<\/p>\n

\n

I know now too that making a family is hard, that the beginning of life is ambiguous, part science, part spirit. \u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

It\u2019s easy to fabricate ambiguity when you discuss none of the relevant science<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\n

With something so fragile, so hard, we should do all we can to support women in their journey, to celebrate when they celebrate, to mourn when they mourn. I will always mourn the loss of my unborn baby, and I will always fight to keep women’s right to choose, and access to abortion, alive.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

It\u2019s a bold choice to end an apologia\u00a0for death with the word \u201calive.\u201d<\/p>\n

What is remarkable here is not the piece\u2019s shallowness, illogic, or avoidance of all relevant facts, but that this sort of thing is so common. The internet\u2019s a big place, and occasionally pro-lifers use bad reasoning too, but it\u2019s also much more common for pro-lifers to constructively<\/a> critique<\/a> each other<\/a> about it, and by and large our movement embraces those who do. Where is the pro-choice equivalent to Scott Klusendorf or Josh Brahm?<\/p>\n

There isn\u2019t one. The closest the other side comes to are the occasional radicals<\/a> who rail against<\/a> their fellow travelers for the \u201csafe, legal, and rare\u201d mantra not being absolutist enough\u2014hardly a call for more rigorous logic, objectivity, or fairness. Those are afterthoughts, as are the lethal consequences for abortion\u2019s victims.<\/p>\n

As disgusting and wrong as pro-slavery arguments that blacks were better off in bondage<\/a> were, those were at least arguments. America\u2019s gravest moral crisis since then deserves better.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Last time we checked in with the factually challenged \u201cnews explainer\u201d Vox, Executive Editor Matthew Yglesias was testing out the novel (and by \u201cnovel\u201d I mean \u201chorrifying\u201d) argument that the birth of his son convinced him that killing little tykes just like baby Jose needs to stay legal. In a similar vein, on Wednesday the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":54,"featured_media":66003,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false},"categories":[15],"tags":[19,2620,1767,1173,1206,3483,3741],"yoast_head":"\nVox writer: Miscarriage convinced me to keep fighting for abortion - Live Action News<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"With philosophical drivel rivaling late-term abortionist LeRoy Carhart's rhetoric, writer Julia Pelly thinks women's feelings determine when life begins.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/archive.liveaction.org\/news\/vox-writer-miscarriage-convinced-keep-fighting-abortion\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Vox writer: Miscarriage convinced me to keep fighting for abortion - 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