{"id":211367,"date":"2019-09-25T10:12:40","date_gmt":"2019-09-25T15:12:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.liveaction.org\/news\/?p=211367"},"modified":"2019-09-24T22:42:51","modified_gmt":"2019-09-25T03:42:51","slug":"abortion-doula-emotional-reaction-child-ultrasound","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.liveaction.org\/news\/abortion-doula-emotional-reaction-child-ultrasound\/","title":{"rendered":"Abortion doula has unexpected emotional reaction to her own child’s ultrasound"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>

In a book about abortion doulas, who comfort women as they abort their babies, pro-choice authors Mary Mahoney and Lauren Mitchell tell the story of a doula named Kira. Kira was pro-abortion and assisted in many abortions as a doula and was completely committed to the pro-abortion cause. But when she herself got pregnant and sought an abortion, she discovered that the traditional argument — that a fetus is just tissue or a collection of cells — did not ring true.<\/p>\n

When having a pre-abortion ultrasound, Kira asked to see the screen. The technician cautioned her and asked if she was sure she wanted to see it, but Kira said she was \u201ccurious.\u201d<\/p>\n

The tech turns the screen toward her.\u2026 She discovers she is ten-and-a-half weeks along, the pregnancy a little larger than a lima bean. The tech points it out on the monitor. \u201cRight there.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Kira\u2019s eyes well with tears she didn\u2019t even know she was holding back. She can\u2019t stop looking. Formations of tiny legs and tiny arms lighten the screen.\u00a0That\u2019s my baby. The weight of her decision hits her.<\/em><\/p>\n

When Kira saw her child, all the pro-abortion labels for the baby, the words \u201cproducts of conception\u201d and \u201cfetal tissue\u201d became meaningless. She saw and understood that this was her \u201cbaby.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"\"

Internal view of a preborn human child – approx. 10 weeks<\/p><\/div>\n

Kira was surprised by her own reaction:<\/p>\n

Kira had not anticipated her reaction to the ultrasound, her intense connection to the pregnancy. As she leaves the clinic, she realizes that her activism and years as an abortion doula could never have prepared her for her own emotional response.<\/em><\/p>\n

Kira was still set on getting an abortion, but the reaction of her friends, who dehumanized her baby, upset her:<\/p>\n

As Kira reaches out to friends and colleagues in the field, she also finds herself unprepared for the response she gets from a movement she cares so much about. Words and phrases that are part of Kira\u2019s vocabulary as a doula: \u201cYou\u2019ll get through this. Products of conception,\u201d and \u201cparasite\u201d make her feel distanced from the work she has dedicated her life to. She knows everyone is only trying to be supportive, but they seem to be missing the point \u2013 calling her pregnancy everything but \u201cbaby\u201d feels wrong and awful to her.<\/em><\/p>\n

Kira suddenly saw that calling a preborn baby a \u201cparasite\u201d and \u201cproduct of conception\u201d did not reflect the reality if what was in her womb. She was disillusioned and says:<\/p>\n

I had identified with this political movement that felt like home to me. Fighting for people\u2019s choices. And the language we were using \u2013 it made me feel like I was being separated from my experience\u2026 there was an assumption that because I was so political and had done all this work that I wouldn\u2019t feel anything about it.<\/em><\/p>\n

READ:\u00a0Abortion doulas: Women suffer during abortions, but no one wants us to admit it<\/a><\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Kira tried to explain her feelings to her friends, and they did try to adjust their responses. Still, she felt angry that her friends had initially responded the way they did:<\/p>\n

When she speaks to her friends about it, they shift their responses. They admit they are unaware of what she needs and how she is feeling. But she still remembers those initial words and their connection to the larger pro-choice framework that many doulas and activists are trained on.<\/em><\/p>\n

Sadly, even though she knew she was killing her baby, Kira went through with the abortion anyway. Afterwards, She reflected:<\/p>\n

I still don’t think we get it right. There are plenty of times now that people say, “It’s just a medical procedure.” No, it’s not having your tonsils out. It’s not having your wisdom teeth pulled. You’re having life pulled from your body. And that’s not to say that I regret my decision. That’s not at all what I’m saying. It’s just that I don’t think we are doing a service to people by taking the emotion out of abortion as a means of making it legal and right and just and slapping a term of “medical procedure” on it. It erases the story.<\/em><\/p>\n

The book does not follow Kira after this point. We have no way of knowing how Kira will cope with the abortion weeks, months, or years from now. After her abortion,\u00a0 she didn\u2019t abandon her pro-abortion position, or stop her work as an abortion doula. She said she does not regret the abortion. But she has been forced to acknowledge some uncomfortable (for pro-choicers) truths about abortion \u2013 that it is nothing like \u201cgetting your wisdom teeth pulled\u201d and is, in fact, the killing of a real child.<\/p>\n

Source: Mary Mahoney and Lauren Mitchell The Doulas: Radical Care for Pregnant People <\/em>(New York: Feminist Press, 2016) 76, 77-78<\/p>\n

\u201cLike\u201d Live Action News on Facebook<\/a>\u00a0for more pro-life news and commentary!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

\"https:\/\/give.liveaction.org\/life-defender\/?utm_campaign=FA19%20LDMB%20LANWEB&utm_source=LANWEB&utm_medium=LAN\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

In a book about abortion doulas, who comfort women as they abort their babies, pro-choice authors Mary Mahoney and Lauren Mitchell tell the story of a doula named Kira. Kira was pro-abortion and assisted in many abortions as a doula and was completely committed to the pro-abortion cause. But when she herself got pregnant and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":153,"featured_media":209195,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false},"categories":[4,3473],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nAbortion doula has unexpected emotional reaction to her own child's ultrasound<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\""I don't think we are doing a service to people by taking the emotion out of abortion... and slapping a term of "medical procedure" on it." ~ Abortion doula\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/archive.liveaction.org\/news\/abortion-doula-emotional-reaction-child-ultrasound\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Abortion doula has unexpected emotional reaction to her own child's ultrasound\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\""I don't think we are doing a service to people by taking the emotion out of abortion... and slapping a term of "medical procedure" on it." ~ Abortion doula\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/archive.liveaction.org\/news\/abortion-doula-emotional-reaction-child-ultrasound\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Live Action News\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/liveaction\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-09-25T15:12:40+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2019-09-25T03:42:51+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/archive.liveaction.org\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/GettyImages-97498473-ultrasound-2.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1188\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" 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