{"id":198814,"date":"2019-03-24T08:11:37","date_gmt":"2019-03-24T13:11:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.liveaction.org\/news\/?p=198814"},"modified":"2019-03-20T22:15:18","modified_gmt":"2019-03-21T03:15:18","slug":"hadnt-gotten-over-abortion-43-years","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/archive.liveaction.org\/news\/hadnt-gotten-over-abortion-43-years\/","title":{"rendered":"I thought I had gotten over my abortion. 43 years later, I learned I hadn’t."},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>

When I was only 15 years old, I met a man who was four years older than I was. His name was Joe. He would talk me into skipping school, so I missed a lot of days from school that year. I knew that I would fail the ninth grade. Joe asked me to marry him, and since I knew I would fail the ninth grade, I said yes. I didn\u2019t love him but I had too much pride to repeat the year.<\/p>\n

I changed my birth certificate to 1955. My mother lied to the judge about my age. She told him I was 16. In 1972, you could marry at 16. So I married Joe and we moved into his parents house.<\/p>\n

I went to the doctor to get on birth control pills, but I was afraid to take them. I became pregnant after only being married for three months. In November, I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. Then, in 1975, I gave birth to another baby girl. In 1976, I became pregnant again with our third child, and I was only 20 years old.<\/p>\n

My husband didn\u2019t like to work; instead, he drank and smoked marijuana every day.\u00a0I wasn\u2019t happy, and I knew that our marriage was not going to last to much longer. So we decided to get an abortion. I was eight weeks pregnant when I had it done at a hospital.<\/p>\n

When I woke up, it was over, but I was very depressed and I felt as though someone had sucked my soul out of me. I didn\u2019t tell anyone else about the abortion. I cried most every day and I felt great guilt. I never expected this to happen. I could not tell anyone how I felt. I decided I would keep it to myself.<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t know anything about what a fetus looked like at eight weeks along. At the time I had my abortion, there was no way to hear a heartbeat or see a sonogram. I had nightmares for many months and I felt empty inside. I regretted what I had done. After six months of being depressed, I just hid my pain and put it deep into myself.<\/p>\n

READ:\u00a0Post-abortive mom: Abortion regret \u2018weighs down every fiber of your being\u2019<\/a><\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

In 1978 I divorced my husband. I had always desired to be a nurse, so I entered college and began my studies. In 1981, I graduated from nursing school. I was very surprised to learn how an eight-week-old fetus looked and to learn that the heartbeat began at 16 days after conceiving.<\/p>\n

I was heartbroken.<\/p>\n

I went to work in obstetrics after graduation. I would not think about the abortion again. Until recently.<\/p>\n

When I found out that some states want to allow full term abortions, I was appalled. I then watched a video about women sharing their abortions and how they felt afterwards. The feelings about my abortion came to the surface of my mind and heart. I cried for days and grieved the loss of my baby. He or she would be have been 42 years old had I not aborted the baby.\u00a0I wonder what my baby would look like and the person that he or she would have been today. I know how much my two grown daughters mean to me (I remarried in 1982) and grieve that I took a life.<\/p>\n

I prayed to the Lord for His forgiveness and I longed to hold my baby that I killed. I relived it all over again — the heartache and the empty feelings that I had experienced over 43 years ago. I prayed that I could forgive myself as well. I told my parents about what I had done and they cried with me, and I also asked for their forgiveness. I told my two daughters about the abortion as well.<\/p>\n

Today, I feel forgiven and very determined to help anyone with my story. I have signed up for the pro-life march in Richmond on April 3rd, and I want to march as many times as marches are held.\u00a0If I can help anyone from telling my story, that would help me so much.<\/p>\n

Abortion is wrong and, to me, immoral. I take hope in seeing my baby in heaven someday. Abortion hurts women rather than helping them out of an unplanned pregnancy — it hurts the soul and spirit. I never thought for a moment that I would have such a delayed reaction as I have experienced. Women need to know this can happen. Instead of relief from an unplanned pregnancy, it causes pain that no medication can heal or relieve.<\/p>\n

This personal story was submitted to Live Action News by Gloria M.\u00a0<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u201cLike\u201d Live Action News on Facebook<\/a> for more pro-life news and commentary!<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When I was only 15 years old, I met a man who was four years older than I was. His name was Joe. He would talk me into skipping school, so I missed a lot of days from school that year. I knew that I would fail the ninth grade. Joe asked me to marry […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":10,"featured_media":191986,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false},"categories":[7077,4],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nI thought I had gotten over my abortion. 43 years later, I learned I hadn't.<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The feelings about my abortion came to the surface of my mind and heart. 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